Lindsay, Lindsay, Lindsay. Why can’t you keep your head down while working on your comeback?
On Sunday, mean girl Lindsay Lohan decided to take to Twitter and complain, “Why did I get put in jail and a nickelodeon star has had NO punishment(s) so far?"
Look, I’m not defending Amanda Bynes, who shocked many of us who associate her with the peppy characters she played on the sitcoms The Amanda Show and What I Like About You. In fact, if Bynes is found guilty of the two hit-and-run charges and DUI charge, I hope she gets what any of us would have received in that situation – jail, or maybe even prison.
But the last person who should be clamoring for Bynes to receive her just due is Lohan, who has been blessed with chance after chance after chance.
Lohan forgets her own troubled past began in 2007 when she was arrested on a misdemeanor DUI charge after losing control of her car and striking a curb in Beverly Hills. Two weeks after she checked into rehab, she was arrested again for DUI as well as cocaine possession and driving with a suspended license.
And what kind of time did Lohan do after her actions? A mere 84 minutes in a Los Angeles County jail, thanks to jail overcrowding.
One has to wonder whether any women serving time in jail at the same time as Lohan were really guilty of more serious offenses than Lohan. Can you imagine Jane Cellmate tweeting, “Why do I have to spend months in jail when a Disney star lasted little more than an hour? #meangirlssuck”
But 2007 isn’t the end of Lohan’s incarceration experiences, and after Wednesday, there could be another.
In 2010, she was ordered to serve 90 days in jail for missing alcohol counseling sessions in violation of her probation. And although a sobbing Lohan insisted she did everything she had to do, she needn’t have wasted her tears – she spent fewer than two weeks in jail that time.
Then, in 2011, Lohan decided to mix things up a bit by paying a short visit to the Kamofie and Company jewelry store and allegedly walking out without paying for a necklace, valued at $2,500. Lohan later pled no contest to a misdemeanor shoplifting theft charge and did her time, big surprise, in home confinement.
Now reports say she was arrested in New York early Wednesday morning for leaving the scene of an accident. She was soon released after being accused of hitting someone with her Porsche as she attempted to park in front of her hotel around 2 a.m.
Add to these forays in and out of jail the fact Lohan also has checked in and out of rehab. Not to mention the multiple attempts on behalf of Hollywood to reach out. They’ve cast her alongside Meryl Streep, in popular TV shows, such as Ugly Betty, in the edgy Robert Rodriguez film Machete, and most recently as Elizabeth Taylor in TV bio Liz & Dick.
Chance after chance after chance.
Meanwhile Dana Plato spins in her grave. (Remember her? The cute freckled sister in Diff’rent Strokes? She didn’t receive half as many chances as Lohan before she died of a drug overdose.)
It seems Lohan still has a lot of growing up to do. It’s far too soon for her to compare her brief stints in jail to Bynes’ situation.
For one thing, the justice system needs time to work. Bynes deserves legal representation just as much any other U.S. citizen. Secondly, Lohan has only been free for less than a year. She has a long way to go before she can point fingers or whine about any perceived unfairness.
Lohan just needs to remember what Judge Stephanie Sautner told her in March: “Live your life in a more mature way, stop the nightclubbing and focus on your work.”
While she’s at it, Lohan also should refrain from hurling tweets from the glass house in which she resides.